originally posted by Lyssabits
Well, I'm inclined to think that the Law of Major Balance is one of those laws that you can violate if you're unaware, but have a hard time violating once you are, my evidence being that Arithon experienced such a violent backlash when he violated it by unmaking the arrow in Curse of the Mistwraith… I suppose his subsequent lack of access to mage talent was self-induced, but that initial bout of unconsciousness wasn't. Or am I missing thing? It's true that humans with a lack of awareness seem to violate it all the time, which is one of the reasons for the High Kings to exist in the first place. Which was my point about the the Brotherhood. Since they're aware, I can't imagine that they'd set themselves up as folks who could legitimize a marriage… bless a marriage is a totally different role from saying you can't really be married without our approval.
originally posted by Lyssabits
Spoilers… or something
As for the thing with the sex being a cure-all… I got the impression that it was a cure-all for Arithon and Elaira specifically. Also that it was being used to cure backlash specifically and not really anything else. I did find it kinda weird and didn't really like that it was being used that way… but given what we know about the exchange of energies during the act, I can see why it would work that way. Someone like Elaira or Arithon would be able to manipulate those forces to do more than just flow back and forth.
End spoilers
There's really never been any doubt in my mind as to whether or not Arithon and Dalwyn got physical. There were plenty of little hints from Elaira's view of it during lane watch, to Dakar's ribbing him for setting up camp in Dalwyn's tent, to Dalwyn and Arithon's conversation about whether or not Arithon was free to offer himself that way. The thing with Arithon is, you're right, he wouldn't have sex without love. But who's to say what sort of love is appropriate? Arithon is the master of empathy, I'm sort of convinced there's very few people he couldn't bring himself to love, and he already admired Dalwyn and cared about her after the events with Jilleth (I'm probably spelling that wrong.) People are capable of loving each other in so many different ways and showing that love in just as many ways, I don't think it's right to decide that some methods are only appropriate in ONE circumstance. If Arithon and Dalwyn were to come together for a brief time, I know the both of them would do so with nothing but respect for each other. Arithon told her about Elaira, so there was no deception, and Dalwyn wasn't accepting the position as "second best", she entered into that relationship with different expectations and for her own reasons. Nothing exploitative about that relationship, unlike relations in a brothel.
originally posted by Sundancer
Thanks Lyssabits, I'm going to have to re-read Arithon and Dalwyn's time together, I didn't recall Arithon setting up in Dalwyn's tent, though I did recall them as having had a close relationship that Dakar (bless his cotton socks) would have seen in the worse possible light at the time. I also recall Dalwyn remembering Arithon with longing and affection. Maybe it's just me, I couldn't reconcile Arithon, with his hopeless (as he saw it) but incredibly deep love for Elaira, being prepared to sleep with anyone else, especially as he knew Elaira would be aware of it though their link.
I think the backlash that Arithon suffered when he unmade the arrow was because that was much more than breaching the Law of the Major Balance, it was actually unmaking something, which had (if I recall rightly) the risk of unmaking everything including Arithon. A breach of the Law of the Major Balance would be, for example, forcibly bringing Jilleth back when she was at death's door, instead of seeking her willing consent to return. It would appear that the Koriathain do it all the time.
originally posted by Lyssabits
What's the point of being true to someone who you can *never* have? That's not to say that I think you should jump into the bed of the next willing thing to come along, but yanno, Arithon was, as you say, HOPELESSLY in love with Elaira. 
At that point he was rejecting the relationship as much as he could, because he didn't want Elaira to suffer any consequences as a result. I suspect his relationship with Dalwyn was possible due to a whole constellation of circumstances: They'd shared the experience of Jilleth's death, which was particularly hard on Dalwyn due to her barrenness and the fact that she was disbarred from seeking physical comfort of any kind from a member of her clan, Arithon was freshly from the experience with Elaira and very vulnerable, and he was planning a slaughter that would be anathema to his every instinct… yanno, both of them had some stuff going on. Can you blame them for latching onto ANY good thing to come along? Arithon was the only one available to comfort Dalwyn as no one else would have anything to do with her and as the one person who could truly understand her loss, she was drawn to him. Dalwyn was there and in need of comfort at a time when Arithon was struggling with a number of losses and heartaches, this was something positive and joyous he could offer someone in the face of all the death he was contemplating doling out. Knowing that he could never be with Elaira in the same way, knowing that Dalwyn didn't expect anything more than he was prepared to offer and that he wouldn't leave any children behind… I din't, and neither did Elaira, see it as any kind of comment on the love he felt for her.
originally posted by motley
Spoilers for Warhost of Vastmark:
There was a HUGE deal made out of Dalwyn's infertility. She had no kids with her first husband, then was allowed congress with five others, still no kids, so she had to wear BELLS to advertise her infertility, which meant, no relationships. That allowed Arithon not only to empathise with her, but to comfort her physically, and ease his own pain, without any possible children coming of it.
I had no doubt in my mind that it happened, and for a young man as he was then, not entirely unexpected. It made him human in my mind. But then, that's just what I read into it. 
Yip, these are such great discussions. I really enjoy coming on and reading/participating. Learning a lot.
originally posted by motley
ps: - bells were ringing for Dalwyn, but not marriage ones… a nicely written reversal.